Friday, March 18, 2011

Whine post

Is it sad that I’m ready to be done? After last night I’m really ready to throw my hands up and walk away, just drop everything and go. I mean I want to leave, but I don’t.
I know I don’t have it as hard as others do, but to me it’s a lot. And some of the things may be stupid to others but they’re big to me. Take last night as an example.
St. Patrick’s day. It’s my one of my favorite holidays, possibly the only reason is that everything is green. I have been excited since February for yesterday, especially since my RS was going to throw a party for it and the birthday of RS. My 2nd councilor was awesome in getting things done for it, she reserved the room, bought the food and eating stuff, and helped me set up. Not to mention she had to put up with my sporadicness, and all the stress of school getting closer to finals. Yesterday I was so excited as I decked out in my green outfit, bought the desserts, and some other things (I lost slight enthusiasm when I felt like an idiot waiting till the day of to buy decorations but I got over it quickly). The ham was delicious as Gryf made a wonderful honey mustard glaze for it.
We got to the room early so we could set up the Pres. Of RS B was there to help out. Did I mention all three RS had gotten in on it by this point? I was stoked, we had all the food and things there and ready to go. All that we needed was the girls so we waited….and waited…and waited. At 7:45 some girls had shown up so we started. By 8 a few more had trickled in but no where near the number I was hoping. I was expecting at least 50 out of the 150 girls in our ward, less than 30 showed. Only 6, not including myself, were from my RS. Down came all feelings of excitedness of St. Patrick’s day. All that ran through my head the whole entire night is the quote from Remember the Titans “Attitude reflects leadership” and your girls have a horrible one. Now I’m not saying that this one night made me think of this, it’s been little things all through the semester that have happened, my apartment for one. But that quote still echoes in my head. Yes, the girls that were there had some fun, and I was able to help Pres. B with some of her boy troubles but still only 30?

Can I just go home now?

Saturday, March 12, 2011


"The universe is made of stories, not of atoms."~Muriel Rukeyser
So I was reviewing past post yet again and found this. I know I've done it twice but I think i might make it and annual thing. See how I keep changing and all that.
8 Things I’m passionate about
The news (as some of you know after hearing me rant about how stupid people can be)
The gospel
Different cultures

8 Things I want to do before I die
Graduate College
Return to Jerusalem
Receive my Endowment
Paint something well
Buy a house
Have a family
Buy Georgia Boy a Sazuki
Have my own car
(As a side note one of my things on this list last year was to kiss a boy =} )

8 Things I do now
Game with Georgia Boy (both computer and nerdy games....)
Go to ward council
Try to find new, to me, good music
Figure out what the heck I'm doing with my life
Make awesome things in my traditional camping class....I need to post about that....
Sign to myself (sadly it's not nearly as much as it was last year)
Go to I still haven't told you about that....
Marvel at how stupid people are

Things I can not do
Sing ( I do believe this will be on this list forever and ever)
have a consistent sleep schedule
Consistently clean my room
Not smile at the cheese ball that is my boyfriend =}
Go a Sunday without feeling overwhelmed
Scare a little when anyone mentions a certain eternal commitment.
Say what I am truly thinking (I'm getting better though)

8 Things I often say
"Human Resources this is Kanani"
"Are you freaking kidding me?!"
"I'm with Georgia Boy"
"Hola aami! Como estas?" (Aami, or whatever english spelling, is "my mother" in Arabic. Yes, I mix what little Spanish and Arabic I know)
"You still have that song stuck in your head?"
"Why are people so stupid?"
"Did I tell you this already?"
"What are you thinking?"

8 Favorite foods
Potato Salad
Greek Nachos
Salt and vinegar chips
(yeah this list hasn't really changed lol)

8 Things you may not have know about me
I still have that 14 year old urge to dye my bangs green every once in a while....
I'm trying to learn snowboarding
When I'm not the leader I'm a good leader, when I'm appointed a leader, I'm awful.
I fell in love with Georgia (the state), which is a perfect validation for my wanting to live on the east coast.
Cheesy puns make me happy. (this is on the list from last year, it made me laugh because a certain someone can be very cheesy sometimes.)

Monday, March 07, 2011

Just a thought...

I would be most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookshelves. ~Anna Quindlen, "Enough Bookshelves," New York Times, 7 August 1991

I love reading, it's something that my wonderful Da and Mum passed down to me and my sisters. Some of my fondest memories when I was little are driving through canyons to get to Nannie's condo and listening to Da read LOTR. Books have been a great escape for me. They set me apart when I was younger. I mean who knows a third grader who read The Hobbit, The Fellowship, and Two Towers within a month of each other? (I stopped there because Da hadn't finished reading Return of the King to us). I almost always had a book in my hand, and if not a book a pen and notebook to write my own horribly thought out ones. And thus they have helped shaped and keep my vivid imagination. And after tonight I think they have helped shape my personality and who I am.
At FHE we were thinking up ideas for a movie for our ward movie awards. We decided to have famous good guys versus famous bad guys. Someone mentioned Gandalf which lead to Frodo and Sam, which lead to Gimli, Legolas, and Aragorn (and talk of The Hobbit movie). One of my roommates leaned over to the other and said something to the effect of "What are they talking about?" The other had no idea either. One of the boys politely leaned over and told them it was Lord of the Rings. "Oh, I've never read or seen those." The other nodded in agreement.
Okay, I understand not reading them, they are long and do drag in some parts but you didn't see them? What do they teach you in California? To hide under bushes when something epic comes out? I mean, some people aren't into trends I guess.
But it did push me into thinking of why people think I am more mature than my age. Could this be a reason? Could reading epics like LOTR and Narnia really have given me that much of an edge on maturity? To beat a 23 year old in reasoning skills? I don't want to be harsh on them or anything but I have had a lot of people tell me they couldn't believe that I was only 18 or 19 or 20, whatever age I was. They always pegged me as 23 or older. (As a freshman in high school a cashier asked me what I was studying, turned out she thought I was a freshman in college.)
Do the books I read really have that much effect on who I am? On how I think and act? Are they the reason people don't peg me as the stereotypical Utah Mormon? Dear Georgia Boy kept thinking I was from Colorado, after all.

If they have had this big of an effect on my life, I am glad I have read mostly well written, clean novels. Some have been trash but I usually don't end up finishing those. And if they helped me become the person I am, I thank you Mum and Da for introducing a fierce love of books to me. Apparently all those nights staying up late reading did do some good after all =}

Friday, March 04, 2011


"Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up." Inigo Montoya

I put Georgia Boy through a lot, and I mean a lot. From the very beginning he has had his work cut out for him.
While we made an instant connection from the start his patience was tested until I was in the realm of singles again. And even then I was standoffish to him in some ways. Physical contact in any way shape or form was one of them. Yes, I wouldn't even give him a hug, I was that weird about it. I had at this point decided that the two of us were only going to be really good friends. Yeah, that lasted about a month, less than that actually, but it took a while to act on it. Not only that but I knew he was leaving for five months.
But he came back early. And we continue to date.
He was, and still is, frustrated with the fact that somehow I can always get him talking, and talking, and talking. What can I say? It's how I was with people in high school, it seems to work up here too. They talk, not me. People are more comfortable that way. Plus most of the people out there need someone they can unload on, not even unload but talk to. That's me. But it is a point that he finds very frustrating. He tries to steer the conversation back towards me , but I somehow get it back to him. I do it so naturally now I don't even notice I do it.
Lately I have been going to my dear Georgia Boy in tears, a lot. I think at least once a week I have gone to him this way. It also seems that the beginning of the month is a bad time too. January was when I was feeling totally overwhelmed by being called as Relief Society president, so much so that I cried at almost every Sunday for a month, and some weekdays. February was when the drama with the apartment happened. And this week, I'm not really sure what set it off but the tears flowed on Thursday. And last night was because I was once again frustrated between the lack of respect between roommates (Yes, I am quite aware that this is ridiculous to cry at, but I am sick of double standards. Plus I was about to punch their friend, so I cried instead... try figure that one out). He just smiles when I try to stutter out an apology for crying, usually saying something to the effect of that's why he's there:To be a human tissue and teddy bear.
He also has a hard time getting me to decide anything. I blame being the youngest for this fact. I usually go with what others want because, well, it's easier for everyone that way.
Also it took almost a month for me to say the L word back to him. Oh yeah....that's probably a story all ya'll would like to hear huh? And the date where we drifted through some shops....I need to post those stories........
There are more things that I have put him through, some I know, and mostly likely more I that I don't know about, but he has stuck around and is pretty determined to stay around. So this is my way of saying thank you to him.

Well gotta blaze!

Thursday, March 03, 2011

Oi! You with the face!

Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives.
C. S. Lewis

Dear Georgia Boy,
I love you.
Love, A Utah Girl

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

For realz this time

"It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter." Marlene Diectrich

Alright Thanksgiving...
The Thursday before Thanksgiving, Mum drove up, picked us up and drove us back down to hometown. Friday I got a cute haircut (thank you so much Brooke, I love it!), and continued to hang out with family and Georgia. Saturday was pretty uneventful and mostly consisted of talking and playing games. Sunday, Georgia and I went to the singles ward and I got to show him off. Plus I got to see some of my wonderful single friends.
We should have gone to bed early that night but I stayed up talking to mum and Georgia heard us so he came and talked too. We went to bed around 3 I think, oops. We had to leave around 6:30 to make sure we made it to the airport on time. But we did! We got through airport security no problems and we even avoided those new found scanner things. Oh did I mention we got to use the new terminal?
Our first flight left a little late, but it was smooth sailing. Georgia and I were able to sit next to each other without to much trouble because the flight was pretty much empty. It was a puddle jumper so we had to check our baggage at the gate. Which made a big problem at the other end. See, when I had booked the flight I was thinking of getting to Georgia to see Georgia and not really thinking of layover time. Well this one had 35 minutes and since we were late and had to wait for our baggage.... We made it, but only by a few seconds to our next flight. For that one a happy couple let us sit together. That flight was nice and relaxing too. Did you know Delta has put free wifi on all of its flights? That was a life saver. When we started to fly over Georgia, Georgia (okay for the rest of this post he is going to go back to FHE, the whole Georgia, Georgia thing is getting really annoying) started pointing things out for me. It's crazy over there! It looks like the cities are carved out of the forests! Not to mention there are still green forests over there!
We touched down and proceeded to the transit rail for the airport. Basically it's a subway =} We then got to the train that runs to different parts of Atlanta. FHE stared at the ticket machine for a moment and then hesitantly punched the correct buttons. He laughed after a moment "I know how to do this in Spanish. Is there a button for that?" See he served his mission in Spain and being in Europe trains are the way to go. (Dear America, can we become more like that? It would save a lot of trouble. Love Me) We then got on the train and I loved it! Not only did I get to see a really big city from a train but I loved the atmosphere. I was once again a minority in two ways. 1) religion, and 2) ethnicity. I loved it! The other white couple across from us were very uncomfortable as we were four in about fifty people that were white. Who cares?
Anyway we arrived at the train station and waited for FHE's brother, we will call him Uno. Uno arrived after a very long time of being lost trying to find said station. We then drove to Uno's house, then the boys went to go give a blessing to someone in the ward. That left me with Uno's wife, we will call her Jedi, and the 4 children. The three boys are old enough to run around a be super excited to have FHE there with another play mate. The youngest is a girl, and well, is to young to know what's going on. The boys were very cute and show offish.
When FHE and Uno got back the boys went to bed and we watched Iron Man 2 (not my favorite but it's okay). Then we all went to bed, cause I kinda fell asleep during the movie and Jedi was sick. The next morning FHE and I helped out a little bit before we headed down to his hometown.
It was really cute because Tiny (who is 1 1/2 I believe) wouldn't eat his oatmeal. Jedi was busy with the other children so I thought I would help out.
"Tiny, take a bite of your oatmeal," (this was said in my cute talking to child voice.) He gave me a big smile and did. I got distracted with getting my own breakfast when I heard Jedi talking to Tiny about eating his oatmeal. So I asked him again, and you guessed it, he took another bite. That mixed with his smile was just adorable. Once when I asked him to take a bite he just put his spoon in his mouth. "Tiny, that's cheating, take another bite." Then he took a huge glob and made sure I saw it before eating it. Those kids are cuties.
A little after that we left. I was amazed the whole time too. We were driving through downtown Atlanta but you would never know. It looked like we were in the middle of no where with only trees for company. You could see huge buildings in the distance but that was the only clue, that and the freeway. It was crazy! The trees were still mostly green too!
When we arrived at the hometown, I got a quick tour of the house and we were off again. This time to the lake to have fun on the wave runners. Crazy that it was the end of November and it was warm enough to be out on the lake huh? FHE drove for the first little bit, letting me get the feel of the runner and kinda showing off, and then he let me take over. I actually had lots of fun driving. I was a little nervous at first because it was my first time driving and being on a wave runner. I got the hang of it pretty fast and thus started trying out more things. At one point I started chasing my own wake, trying to get air off of it. Well I had been taking the turns kinda fast, FHE was getting excited to get thrown off, and my last turn did it. I apparently took the turn at about 50 MPH, I have no idea I wasn't looking at my speed, and we were thrown clear off. My first though was "holy crap! I'm sorry." That's what I was going to say when I swam to the surface, however the water was so cold it put my body into shock and I couldn't get any words out. I started to freak out before I remembered what I had learned in my Wilderness First Aid class that week. Give it a minute or two and you will back to normal. So I just swam to the wave runner and I was able to laugh and talk and stop shivering. FHE said that was a perfect way to end the day and he let me drive back to the dock. He later said he hadn't had that good of a ride since he had been out with Choir, his next eldest sister. That made me feel really good about my driving skills =}
The sunsets there are gorgeous by the way. It was a brilliant gold and to have it reflected of the lake was amazing.
That night we just relaxed with Mom and Dad FHE who are a lot of fun.
The next day FHE and I woke up early to head out to Savannah. And once again I was in awe of all the trees. When we reached Savannah we went to a light house to get a picture for Mum and tried to find a small lighthouse for her. We then headed across the street to the Atlantic ocean! I have seen it at least three times but I have never touched it, so FHE took me and even let me gather some of the sand there. The water was a little colder than the lake but it was still fun to play in. After the Atlantic we went to try to find Historic Savannah. I got us to drive through the Ghetto( I was the navigator with the map), totally on accident by the way. We even got into a Ghetto accident. We were about to turn left from a one way street when a car streaked past us. The bad part is that he nicked us. About a third of his bumper came off, at which time he pressed his breaks, then he thought better and hit the gas. He didn't come back either. FHE and I were shaken but there was only a small dent in the truck we had borrowed. Luckily we wernt' in the sports car we had wanted to take. See Dad FHE had had a bad feeling about us taking it, and we are very glad we listened. If not that car would have been totalled.
After about another 10-20 minutes of driving we finally found the river walk. That was so much fun. Going into all the little stores and looking for a lighthouse was great. Shopping with a purpose is what I like. Oh really fast, we were stopped by a homeless person asking for donations for a weaved flower. FHE got it for me, it was really sweet(remind me to tell what he did with it for Christmas). The best shop was the candy store however. The shops there aren't very large so when we walked in I was like "oh a small candy store" then we turned to the wall, there was a doorway to the next shop...which was more candy, then there was another doorway to the next shop...which was more candy, then there was another doorway that was more candy! The shop was huge and amazing! They even had this sour formula stuff that I haven't seen in ages but loved when I had it that once. Best shop ever!
It was also fun because, yes, we did browse some jewlery stores, but no we did not go ring shopping, just sayin. FHE got me some really cool looking celtic earings, I kinda want to go back and get the other pair too. Anyone up for a trip? lol.
After we were done shopping we went back to home town. Leaving Savannah I realized that we had a GPS system... that would have been nice to realize before I got us into the Ghetto... good job brain. But we made it safely back to hometown.
Drummer (FHE's oldest sister) and family got there that night and Uno and family were there too. Everyone was glad that we had made it safely. That night Shooter(the second oldest brother) came over to chat. His family was with his wife's family because of an ailing family member. The family council was great, they talked about a reunion that is coming up and some other things. But the best part was that while we were in Savannah FHE had found a BS button. We pulled it out and gave it to FHE dad, and Drummer had fun pressing it throughout the meeting, though it did get passed around once or twice. That had some great laughs.
After the meeting FHE and I soaked in the hottub for a little bit to try to relieve some of the tention from the accident.
Thursday was quite exciting too.
The morning was full of cooking and fun. I was helping make the stuffing, and Roo (the second oldest of Uno and Jedi, and is threeish I think) was sitting next to the island wanting to help, but couln't because he was a little sick. I was working on breaking up bread chunks and saw that he was a little hungry. I had him scoot a little closer on his stool and started to slip him little chunks. But only on the condition that I remain his favorite. I think it worked for a bit lol.
After that was was done FHE dad, with all three sons help, showed me how to deep fry a turkey. Basically you get a really deep, deep fryer, fill it with oil, boil oil then slowly put the turkey in and let it sit.
While there was down time I suggested to FHE that we go off roading. He had been really excited to take me for months. Before we left his mom talked about how much she loved that car, and what memories it held.
His car in high school was a Sazuki that he had taken mostly everything off of so it would be an easy clean after off roading. We drove out to a new spot and had some fun. We avoided several muddy areas and he even let me drive for a bit. Of course where I drove wasn't that hard and I stalled the car right before it got a little hairier. We stopped and I took some pictures of the surrounding area and we started back up again. FHE was driving. We drove about thirty feet before we sank into hidden mud. Oops. We tried for a good while to get out, but it was the kind of mud that you can't get out alone, then we noticed smoke coming from underneath the body. FHE thought it was exhuast at first but then thought it was no oil in the engine. He went to open the hood and the first thing he saw was a little flame under the engine. About that time I looked at the passanger front seat, I had been jumping on the back seat trying to get traction, and saw little orange flames coming through the body. Yes, we had set the car on fire.
Well we had set the brush under the car on fire. FHE proceeded to try to kick mud and such onto the flames to put it out. I was pretty much useless because I had worn my girly flipflops, not thinking I would need sturdier shoes. This went on for a little while then we heard something petrolium based start to catch fire. FHE wasn't to worried about the gas tank exploding but he still wanted me far from it. He deposited me 30 yards away and went back to try to continue to put it out. Then he backed off again when the car was covered in a smoke pillar.
This whole time I was thinking "I set Georgia on fire.... I set GEORGIA on FIRE! Holy crap his CAR!" Did I mention there was a huge dried bush right next to the flames?
We said a quick prayer to Heavenly Father to ask for help and a few minutes later people from a trailer park called 911. A truck that had a hose on the back (off road firetruck!) came, and a nice fireman threw mud onto the gas cap. At this point it was the only thing still burning, it had been spitting flame two feet high. They did a check of the area and deemed it okay. By this time Uno and Giant, Drummer's husband, had shown up with the truck, we had called them after the trailer park called 911 to try to tow us out. Only the truck would have probably gotten stuck too so we left the Sazuki there for the night.
Oh and one of the firemen said that there had been a lagit fire a couple of hundred yards from where we got stuck. Oh hey I remember driving through that chared area. He also said he was glad we had not gotten stuck that way because they had found a den of rattlers over there. You and me both buddy.
FHE and said fireman were doing most of the talking as fireman drove us out of the brush, though FHE did involve me at one point to say I was from Utah. The fireman asked me a question and I think I pretty much confused him. See he had a southern accent and FHE had started to talk in one, so when I answered I had a southern accent. It was kinda fun though.
Going home however was not so much fun. FHE mom laughed it off and was glad we were okay, Dad however not so much. He was pretty angry about it, though it was very contained. We could only talk about what happened in hushed tones and when he wasn't around.
Then I got to call Mum and tell her the news. I went into the backyard found a secluded spot and made the call.
We made small talk for a little bit and then I dove in.
"So you want to hear the exciting news?"
"response I don't remember"
"On Tuesday we went on the wave runners and I threw us off."
"That's a good thing... me trying to explain why.
So you wanna hear about the exciting news yesterday? Proceeded to tell about Savannah."
"But everyone's alright, right?"
"Yup. You wanna hear the exciting news from today?"
"There's more exciting news?"
"Is everyone alright?!"
The conversations then drifted to how everyone was taking it and what would happen to the Sazuki. And that I should wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving.
After FHE and I had cleaned up it was time to eat. It was some good food. There were two turkeys. One was deep fried, and one was oven cooked. FHE mom had put bacon all over it as a natural baister, though that was consumed right after it came out of the oven. Both turkies were so moist. Apparently that was the moistest turky FHE Mom had made and one of the driest FHE dad had made. Both still had moisture drizzle out when you took a bite. So good.
We ate around the ping pong table all decorated and such. There were 16 people total, half of them children under the age of 6.
Later that night Shooter and his family came over and we had fun playing and talking. I think it was that night that FHE and I were standing by the laundry room were you can see straight into the living room. He laughed and whispered in my ear "We have company" I turned to look and there was most of the kids peeking around corners and couches to see us. When they saw me turn they all ducked away and laughed. We did this a few more times and envoked laughes from everyone.
Friday was exciting because Drummer, Jedi and I went to Black Friday. We didn't go super early so it was still nice and relaxed. We took each of their youngest child. So we had E and G both under six months. The three of us had a great time laughing and talking and shopping. E even fell asleep in my arms when we were at Kohls. That was adorable until we went to put her back in her carrier and realized she had exploded. It was still adorable, it just now smelled a little =} I cleaned off my hand with a wipe, and changed my shirt when we got home and it was all good.
It was pretty much a lazy day and that night Uno, Jedi, Shooter and wife, Drummer, Giant, FHE, FHE's friend, and I played games into the night. We played mofia, scum, and murder by wink. It was great. After around midnight the girls went to bed while the boys played rock band. I don't know what time they went to bed. The next morning we said our goodbyes, even getting a quick picture of the two of us with all the nieces and nephews. Apparently the only picture to be taken by the family that week.
FHE mom drove us to the airport. FHE slept in the back which gave mom and I a chance to talk.
At the airport FHE and I used a new way to check through security. We used our cell phones for our boarding passes instead of a physical paper. How cool is that? Once again we avoided the new scanners.
The flight home was uneventful. Though when we hit mountains is was funny to see one side no snow, other side completly covered. When we landed in the airport Llamma and family picked us up and drove us back to IF, and then to Rexburg the next day. It sucked going from warm humidity, and thick air to cold dry, and thin air. And also going back to school.

I think that's all that had happened... I will probably do a random picture dump sometime too.

Oh and some of this was written in December, and some of it in February. So I'm sorry if it is inconsistant with time and detail of story.

Gotta blaze!